I know my twenties are really my time to go and get it.
My brain is fully developing, I’m still young with energy, and I feel like I have time to do so many things.
In the midst of that, I am working on balancing my wants and needs.
I should know those things…
But often, I am finding that I don’t.
I don’t know what I want at a time when I need to make decisions.
I don’t know what I need because I am still learning what is helpful for me, what brings me peace and health.
I’d say I am definitely in the midst of trying to find the choices that will help me grow.
I am always in that space, but it feels different this time.
It feels like I am drawing from scratch while trying to use the knowledge that has come from other drawings.
It’s hard starting from scratch in your mind.
It feels like you can’t really get a grip on where you are, even though it feels like you’ve been here before.
Feelings aren’t always rooted in the history of your drawings.
Sometimes the feelings stem from new anxieties, new possibilities, and things you haven’t seen yet.
When I dive into the “new”, I find it hard to connect with what has been and what’s to come.
I am present, but I am not making progress with what the present is giving me.
Not going through the motions necessarily, just living.
I want to take the pieces from the present and do something with them.
The present is trying to give me presents.
Gifts that I can use to help me understand, grow, and make decisions.
It’s hard to make decisions when the information is new, fresh, and exciting.
Balancing comfort, understanding, emotion, peace, and more.
It feels like a big battle that is stemming from one little moment.
Each moment creates its own battle.
I will get through it, though.
I know I will.
I just want to determine these wants and needs to help me create goals for growth.
Some things feel like they would help, but there are two sides to the coin of learning.
Instead of trying to pick a side before the coin comes to rest, I am letting it flip and taking in the result as the moment which will help me create the next.
What is happening, what I am feeling, what I am thinking, it is all leading me towards figuring these areas out, leading to decisions that will help me grow in the present and the future.
I have goals – what are the wants and needs, and how do they help me grow towards those goals in a reasonable manner?
I am sure about to find out.
That’s one thing I want for sure: To figure this out.
NS
“I believe a few words can change your day and your life.”